February 24th thru March 2nd, 2010

Today is February 24th. My mother is slowing way down and is starting to have some trouble swallowing. We are giving her a thickening agent to make liquids easier to swallow. She has been drinking some milk and a nutritional drink called Boost. Mom takes a few spoonfuls of applesauce when I give her medicine . It’s been a very slow and peaceful decline. It just is hard to imagine that her wonderful life is in the last chapter.

The many different people coming in and out of mom’s room may be wearing on her a bit. We have had a few different caretakers, many different nurses from hospice, family, and friends…she made the comment today “So many looking over my bed…it will all be over soon.” It’s hard to read too much into what she says because she also said…”I hope Norma and Sylvia will come together soon” about what mom? I asked.
"Oh,one says do it this way and the other says do it that way.” I just chuckled. She has been naming her siblings and talking about parties. The other day she asked what day it was.."It's Monday Mom" "Well, that's not a very special day, but we can make it special".

Blanca is a caretaker we hired through a private service and she is a godsend. She is so tender and loving with my mother. My sister also stays 3 nights after work and spends the night. I’m now switching my help to cover days since my oldest daughter will be having a baby in the next couple of weeks. It’s amazing to see how the cycle of life plays out. One life leaving this earth in death, and another life entering the world through birth.

The week before this downturn, mom had some very lucid moments. She was eating some solids and even was using the walker a bit. She walked with support to the restroom from the bed and laughed about the ‘old fashioned bedside commode’. She requested to look at the photo album and had me read from the Bible. We also took some strolls outside while she was in the wheelchair and seemed to breathe in the warm weather air with a sweet appreciation of the beauty around her. I hadn’t seen that for many weeks. The nurse mentioned the fact that often there will be a final spurt of energy and clarity before a swift decline.

I just went in to check on Mom and give her some meds. Blanca has been by her side most of the day. We gave her some liquids through a straw just a bit at a time and then applesauce with her meds. She said clear as day. “Thank you for all the help you give me, thank you. I am praying that she will fall asleep and wake up in heaven very soon.

Today is the 2nd of March.
The nurse came again yesterday and noticed some significant changes and told us of things to expect. Mom was really cute with her and made us all giggle. She still has her sweet sense of humor. Florey (the nurse) said: “Open your eyes Leny, see how beautiful I am” Mom got such a giggle out of that and then opened her eyes and said in Dutch, “I like your black hair and your dark eyes, you are a beautiful woman.” After this very pleasant visit mom went to bed and didn’t get up or use the bathroom since. It’s been over 24 hours.

I slept in her room with her last night and around 2:30 a.m. I woke and asked her if she needed to use the restroom and she said, not yet. I warmed her hot water bottle and asked if I could get her anything and she said she was waiting..”For what, Mom?” I asked. “That Lady.” I said "okay Mom, let’s go back to sleep."

This morning, Beverly arrived to stay with Mom so I could go to Bible Study. Beverly and Mom have a very deep spiritual connection. As soon as she opened her eyes to see Beverly her heart overflowed and she told Beverly that she was Dying. This is the first admission to the obvious fact. Then, she started to cry. After some medications she settled down and they had a beautiful morning. Mom actually saw a vision of a woman standing by the bed, bidding her to heaven. The lady assured mom that this was not her final resting place. Mom asked Beverly if she saw the lady and Beverly asked her to tell her about her. It was an amazing vision and both Beverly and I were filled with Joy of how close and real that heaven was for my mom. I am not sure if the lady that mom was waiting for was Beverly or the one in the vision. But in my book, they are both ANGELS!